목요일, 6월 17, 2004
yesterday we watched moulin rouge, and i say 'we' simply because there was more than one person watching it. he interrupted me about five minutes into the show, asking to watch it as well and why didn't you wait for me? *hurt look* so we ran through the first five minutes again.

why oh why then did the rest of the guys have to make absolute fun of the show itself? argh. it was annoying though, and i knew that in the end it would spawn some question along the lines, no scratch that, totally along the lines of, "have you been in love before?" -- and i didn't answer. up till now i can't imagine why i didn't open my mouth and say so, but it felt right not to say anything, and still feels that way.

i don't wish that i had said that yes, i have loved someone before, in fact, the person i first watched the film with, i loved. but life has its ups and downs and not everything is meant to be. i'm not even sure what i feel for him now, because every time i try to think about it, all i get is a big hole inside of me. ah well, c'est la vie. we have to move on.

something i saw on jared's bloggie.

LAYER ONE
-- Name: tanya
-- Birth date: 04th feb 1984
-- Birthplace: mt eliz
-- Current Location: college
-- Eye Color: dark brown. i think. i don't even know despite sticking my contacts straight into my eyes almost everyday.
-- Hair Color: dark brown
-- Height: short
-- Right handed or Left handed: right handed


LAYER TWO:
-- Heritage: my surname.
-- Weakness: i'd say...lack of self confidence.
-- Biggest fears: heh. that i won't find anyone else.
-- Your perfect pizza: needs to have olives and mushrooms.
-- Goal you'd like to achieve: i want to be truly happy and content.

LAYER THREE: Your...?
-- Most overused phrase(s): eh. wrong! and with all accompanying permutations.
-- Thoughts first waking up: nooooooo....
-- Best physical feature: wrists.
-- Usual bedtime: within the hour of midnight and 1a.m.
-- Most missed memory: eh. better best forgotten.

LAYER 4: pREFERences..
-- Pepsi or Coke: pepsi
-- McDonald's or Burger King: bk. deffo.
-- Single or group dates: single.
-- Lipton Iced Tea or Nestea: neither.
-- Chocolate or vanilla: vanilla.
-- Cappuccino or Latte: cappuccino. frothy. mmm.

LAYER FIVE: Do you...?
-- Smoke: no.
-- Sing: all the time. failing that, humming.
-- Take a shower every day: i'm a multiple shower person.
-- Have a crush(es): right now? i think so.
-- Think you've been in love: before.
-- Want to get married: simple answer, yes.
-- Believe in yourself: occasionally.
-- Get motion sickness: thankfully no.
-- Think you're attractive: sadly no. sniff.
-- u're a health freak: haha... not in a million years.
-- Get along with your parents: quite well.
-- Play an instrument: yeah. nothing particularly exotic or interesting though.

LAYER SIX: In the past month, you've...?
-- Drank alcohol: need you ask?
-- Gone on a date: not exactly.
-- Gone to the mall: yes. inane question.
-- Eaten sushi: nope. jap food costs an arm and a leg here.
-- Been on stage: does the podium count? ha.
-- Been dumped: nope
-- Gone skating: no.
-- Shoplifted: nope.
-- Spied: on what?

LAYER EIGHT:
-- Age you hope to be married: ideally 26. just like my mom.
-- Numbers and Names of Childrens: 2 or 3, or whatever God gives.
-- Describe your Dream Wedding: beautiful, blessed.
-- How do you want to die: not my favourite topic, but not alone.
-- What do you want to be when you grow up? : refer to the previous post. no seriously.

LAYER TEN: List the number of:
-- Drugs taken illegally: 0
-- People I trust with my life: excluding parents and brothers, about 3.
-- CDs that I own: you don't want me to go through this do you. i can't even remember the cds that i own.
-- Piercings: two. one in each ear.
-- Tattoos: 0
-- Times my name has appeared in the newspaper?: 0
-- Scars on my body: quite a few.
-- Things in my past that I regret: not seizing the day often enough.