월요일, 2월 07, 2005
i'm still reeling from the sheer euphoria of last thursday and friday. just today i woke up and burrowed under the covers again, trying to wish myself back to that morning when my first thought was: today's the day. my first few days of being twenty-one haven't been terribly exciting, and to be honest, i look at myself in the mirror and see the same person i was yesterday.

the birthday party has ended. only yesterday as i was letting the air flow out of the balloons that still adorned random corners of the house, i thought about what i was going to do with my twenty-first year. it feels weird saying 'i'm twenty-one', instead of the good old twenty that i've gotten used to.

in the course of a day i've gotten old enough to be legal everywhere. now no one can (technically) tell me what to do, or where to go. i should be feeling liberated and fairy-free, but yet i don't. i want to stay at home, i want to be responsible. i don't think i'm ready to take charge of my life just yet, and i'd rather chill out, hang with my friends and depend on my loving, caring home, siblings and parents.

i'm not a toy 'r' us kid, but i don't really want to grow up. it was like a huge sign over my door letting me know, quite unceremoniously, i might add, that it was about time for me to pass through to the rest of my life. 'welcome to the real world', it says. i'm not too sure about whether i really want to hand over my one-way ticket and get ready to embark on my journey to where i'm about to go.